Say you’re driving through the countryside and see a field of cows. They’ll draw your attention for no more than a moment. In a way, if you’ve seen one cow, you’ve seen them all. But, if you should happen to see a purple cow, that’s a different story…
Most of our clients come to us because some kind of imbalance is leading to life challenges. But it can be so easy to forget - we have 12,000 chances a day to come back to balance…
We can help ourselves find new clients is by letting go of a common misconception that gets in the way…
I’d love to see you at my upcoming class through Spiritual Directors International: Expanding Our Spiritual Direction Voice!
We get hunches, annoyances, surprises, wonderings. Each of them is a doorway into a deeper conversation. These flashes of incongruity can be powerful tools in spiritual direction...
The ability to lead and the ability to follow a client are two different but interrelated skills. When we get these two things right, we can access unexpected depth and transformation. The catch is, we need to get our own egos out of the way, and bring our full selves...
Here’s what I’ve seen in working with hundreds of spiritual directors: we all like the middle. Here’s what I’ve seen in working with hundreds of clients: clients like the edge…
Usually I work at my computer and do the most urgent thing that pops into my mind. Sometimes I take a deep breath, look at the bigger picture of my work, and do the most important thing. Our clients all have a Sometimes like this - let’s help them expand it…
Deep down, our clients know as well as we do - the blame game has no winners. Good spiritual direction helps clients recognize and exit the blame game. Here’s how…
So many clients go into a tailspin based on how they perceive their mistakes (don’t we all!). But we spiritual directors can help them see how they habitually make a mis-take in how they view their mistakes…
We can help our clients get past "should-ing" and shaming themselves, enabling their empowerment and inspired action instead. Here's how we reframe...
The spiritual director’s role is helping clients become more selfish, spiritual, and sensational. Woah - selfish? Yep, you read that right. Becoming selfish is one of the most heretical and important steps anyone takes. How can this be? Here’s the twist…
What a powerful reflex self-doubt is: an exciting possibility comes to mind; self-doubt injects a shot of fear about all the ways it could go bad. With how much we care for our clients, it’s tough to see self-doubt insinuate itself into their lives. Here's how we can redirect it…
Clients sometimes believe that their problems reside outside of them. The truth is that their perception - or more accurately, the misperception that they are disempowered - is often the problem…
I am often reminding myself and my clients of this:
In a grace-filled and loving universe, there is a natural process of goodness, peace, and abundance that is always at work within us. So it isn’t our job to go out and create these experiences. It is our practice to awaken to them in this moment…
Okay, the title is a shameless attempt to get your attention. AND, there’s a truth in helping clients give up a certain kind of prayer. We need to help people connect deeply with God in our sessions, and some ways of praying are more effective at that than others…
If you’re like me, you have a dream and desire for spiritual work that both excites and intimidates you. As you look ahead to this year, I hope my thoughts here can help you understand better how to turn those dreams and desires into plans, and then into reality. To start, let’s talk about dreams…
Each spiritual director has a voice that is real and honest. It’s the voice that comes forth when we are with those family members and friends that we feel really comfortable with. I believe that using more of this voice is a real game-changer in spiritual direction work…
Our 4th Way Groups are a powerful experience. They deepen your work with clients, as well as your own spiritual practice. I encourage you to check out our next one…
In this video, I share a reflection on the art of being still, after a recent session with a busy client. What does it mean to be still in our bodies, emotions, and minds? A 4th Way emerges as we practice this art of stillness. I also discuss the importance of this practice for spiritual directors, and how helpful it is in client sessions…
Very few of us were drawn to spiritual work because we wanted to run a business. However, once we start seeing clients, running groups, or selling products, it quickly becomes clear that the necessities of business have wiggled their way into our lives…
Over the years, I’ve gotten 4 recurring questions from spiritual directors who are eager to improve and grow their practice. Here, I share my answers to each of these questions…
If you’ve ever felt inadequate as a spiritual director, you’re not alone: imposter syndrome is a hallmark of our vocation. It becomes problematic we act out of a fear of inadequacy, preventing ourselves from taking risks in our work...
By inviting clients into the here-and-now of a conversation, we help guide their attention inward. We invite them to become present to what’s unfolding in the moment. Here’s how we find the here-and-now in session…
The mind likes concepts. The heart loves images. A heart-based conversation gets activated by creativity, by images, by out-of-the box explorations. I invite you to explore an image with me here, and see what it stirs in your heart: picture a pilot light…
In my years as a spiritual director and supervisor, here’s one of the most important things I’ve learned: So much of what makes for a good spiritual direction session comes down to following feelings rather than mere information. This distinction sounds obvious - we all know the difference…
The number one question I’ve heard from people trying to make a go of a spiritual direction practice is, “How do I get more clients?” How do navigate this tricky terrain, of inviting clients to work with us in a way that has integrity?
It takes a unique and sophisticated skillset to join and guide others spirituality. But the #1 misconception about spiritual guidance work is that our skills are what make all the difference in reaching clients. Here’s the higher-level truth: mindset trumps skillset…
Who’s on your Mount Rushmore? Here’s the interesting thing about the people you admire: You wouldn’t notice them if you didn’t already possess some of what you admire in them…
It’s so easy for us to forget, in the midst of our genuine desire to be helpful spiritual guides, that we are not working alone. Functional atheism arises in that moment when I feel the weight of “it’s all up to me.” Here’s the pattern I’ve seen, and how we relax into, and be guided by, a Power that is greater than ourselves…